How to Stop Worrying

When it comes to worrying, the solution is as simple as mind over matter. "The imagination is the most powerful human mental function," explains Martin Rossman, M.D., a mind-body pioneer and founder ofTheHealingMind.org, an online oasis of guided imagery and self-healing techniques. "It's a great problem solver when used properly, but when we let it run away, it can put us on a hamster wheel of repetitive worry that drags us down, drives us nuts, and makes us anxious and stressed." That hamster wheel of worry is known as bad worry. According to Dr. Rossman's new book, The Worry Solution (Crown Archetype, $23.99), it can be turned into good worry, which helps us better solve problems and manage stress. "The book focuses on a process that teaches people that when they do have to worry, to worry better," explains Rossman. Here are his four steps for developing a good worry habit:

• Get a Clue: Identify the root cause of what's eating at you. Write down everything that you're worried about — from little to big worries, even the mediocre ones. Don't judge yourself; just write down everything that's in your head.
• Get a Grip: Acknowledge what is and what is not in your power. Sort the worries into three columns: things that you can't do anything about, things you can do something about, and things you're not really sure you can do anything about. As an example, Rossman uses hurricanes: you can prepare your house for a hurricane (a worry you can do something about), but you can't do anything about the actual hurricane (a worry you can't do something about).
• Get a Plan: Figure out what you need to do and how you need to get it. For worries you can't do anything about, Rossman suggests learning how to make them positive, rather than negative. "if you're about to hit a golf ball and there's a lake, you don't want to be worrying about hitting the ball in the lake, because then you've created a mental image of just the lake," Rossman says. "You want to identify a spot and tell yourself that you're going to hit the ball there, instead of thinking about the lake." When you put your intention into a positive situation, your negative thoughts will wane.
• Get a Move-On: Put your plan into action. Continue to focus on positive outcomes. To help with the worries in your can-do-something column, Rossman suggests learning to take effective action through guided imagery and good planning skills (find tips at worrysolution.com).