GLAMOUR.com's Guide To The Offside Rule

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Everyone talks about the offside rule as if it's a special secret that only men can understand. It isn't. Read this quick guide and impress all the boys down the pub with your astonishing football knowledge.
'The offside rule isn't difficult,' says our deputy editor Charlotte. 'It's just the most complicated thing about a very simple game.'
Here's the deal:
A player is offside if he's on the side of the pitch belonging to the opposing team, he's in front of the ball (that is, closer to the net he's trying to score in than the ball is), the last contact with the ball was made by a player on his team (e.g. the offside player has received a pass, or interfered with play) and there are less than two players on the opposing team (this can include the keeper) who are at the same point on the field as him or closer to the goal than he is.
See? That's it. Simple. (If you need any further info, you can check out this quick video). And then you can get back to focusing on the more pressing issue of which player has the best legs.